This is a hard week.
I really just feel like a dump truck released it's load on me...I'm not sure if I want to cry, get anxious, or spend a lot more time at church praying for everything in my life to sort itself out. Nothing is going so terribly "wrong," I have healthy kids, a roof over our heads, and food to eat, but there has been a constant parade through my life of various other stressors that have been testing me.
Really, I should just have more faith. It seems as though most things in my life thus far have happened for a reason...I don't always know why at the time, but later it reveals itself to me. Isn't it this way for most people? You pray for something to happen (or NOT happen) and it doesn't work out the way you wanted, and you are angry, anxious, or depressed. Only later, you realize that things worked out exactly how they were supposed to. Now don't get me wrong, I do not have all the answers. I am still waiting for the reasons for certain things in my past to be revealed to me: painful experiences, lost loved ones, missed opportunities, major screw-ups. And I don't believe everyone always gets the answers they were looking for. I think that it is possible that sometimes, things just happen. And this is what scares me.
I just hope that this time, for this period in my life, things work out they way they are supposed to. Whatever that might be.
4 comments:
OK well obviously our quickie lunch time phone conversations have not been adequate lately. I'm going to call you later...
-Lisa
I'm sorry things are rough. That's too bad. I miss seeing you and we really should find time to get together.
Though, I know the answer to some of those questions even if you don't. I was even talking to my mom about this the other day. I literally told my mom that I thought you were one of the strongest people I know, esp considering some of the stuff you've gone through. You amaze me at how even when you're struggling, it doesn't show on the outside. You always seem so strong and I know those experiences have help you be the strong person I know you are!
Thanks guys tour support means do much. I'll fill you in on the details soon. Like I said, nothing I'd too terribly wring, just some stressful logistical things I need to work out! :-)
Ok damn autocorrect!!! No I am not drunk:-)
Post a Comment